To everyone here who says. I think I might be polyam.. I want to open up my relationship.

Do you in your heart. Fully know why? Is it just for sex? Go swinging! It's easy! No shame in it if everyone is on board. Do you fully believe that your current relationship is solid. Does it provide what you need?.. and or are you aware of what it doesn't. Do you know what you want?

First and foremost - Are you solid friends? Are you ready to break hearts? Are you ready to leave? Are you ready to lose friends? Do you want to explore kink? - do it at home first! Not even going to go into the communication skills required.

I'm telling you. You probably don't. Multiple relationships is the Pandora's box of Pandora's boxes Because. There's gonna be some casualties. It may not happen immediately. It might take years. But what will you do when that big ol spotlight finally focusses on your existing relationship.

What if what you see is far too big to ignore. So mind bendingly massive the it took up the whole sky and coloured everything in grey. And now that you experience something else there is colour where ther was none before.

What are you going to do then?

It may not be the polyam that breaks you but. We are not fucking around when we say this is hard. It might get messy. It will get messy. Be aware! If you are opening your heart. It might get broken. Be ready for that. Be ready to grieve. Hard.

It may just be better to stay in the shadows and not know.