My husband and I have been together for going on 15 years; and poly for around 4.

We've been in the same relationships for about 3 of those years. His has been off and on; but has recently been on.

I recently found out from a third party that he and his gf "closed off" their relationship a while ago. He didn't mention anything to me until I brought it up to him, and he said she asked because she "didn't want to share him with anyone else". When continuing the conversation I learned that he spoke to everyone in our friend group about this; but didn't tell me because he felt it "didn't impact our relationship. Later from the same third party I learned that his gf implied to her that he was the one who requested to close off the relationship. When I spoke with him about that he changed his story to "we both wanted it".

Recently I was also informed that his gf bought concert tickets to two concerts for his birthday without consulting anyone, and effectively taking over the entire time around his birthday. I expressed to him that I didn't think it was ok for her to make such big purchases without consulting him, especially ones like that. I was a little hurt because one of the concerts I had wanted to attend.

The whole thing just feels really disrespectful to me and my relationship and I'm trying to figure out if I'm overreacting or not.