I'm in a long distance poly relationship. It's my first poly relationship and I've only been in it a few months and it's taken some getting used to and I know that communication is key throughout. My partner took interest in someone new and I was happy for them, and encouraged them and reassured them about it. But now my partner spends all their time and attention with this new person.

I've asked them to call me so we can hangout when they wake up (before new person is around) but I get ignored and then I next see them in a private call or game with the new person. I have told them I'm not jealous, but that I feel less important than them, that the only thing I resent is being ignored and put last, among other issues I've raised about how I've felt. I've even apologised for having to bring these things up because I don't want them to think I don't understand they're going to have other partners.

They've said they'll change, they've said sorry that I've felt that way, and I've believed them, and then things don't change. Their other partner has also tried to reach out for them to spend time with them (and invited the new person along as well) but it was turned down so they could spend time together alone. Yet when I first joined the relationship I was encouraged to meet their partners and see how we all got along together, and we'd spend a lot of time together, and this new person hasn't once.

There are a lot of more complicated things that I've left out just because if they came across this post they'd know it was about them.

I don't know if this is normal and I'm just overreacting, or what to do. My calm attempts at talking to them are turning more and more bitter and I know the next time the subject comes up I'm likely to snap. Either that or just to not approach them unless they approach me first, but I'm scared they won't even notice that I stopped reaching out.