I'm not really asking for any specific advice on something, but rather would like to express my experience, feelings, and wants in my current open relationship. This is a bit of a rant, but I'll try to say what I need in a relatively consise manner lol.

First, a little background on my partner and I. I'm a young bi curious, possibly gender fluid male (I don't know what labels I fall under but I'm definitely not hetero cis lol). I started dating my non binary partner (she, they) about 3 years ago in college and currently live together at a place where we live at the job. This part is important, as you'll find out later. We first came here for a couple months in the summer, but decided to move back when we finished school. We just arrived a little bit ago.

Before we started dating, I knew I had an interest in non monogamy. Triad relationships seemed especially interesting to me, though I thought it was mostly as a fantasy. When she and I started dating, I talked openly about the fact that I find so many people attractive for different reasons, and I didn't think I wanted to actually be in a relationship with more than one person. But, I am interested in the idea of openness, sexually and romantically. We've talked about it off and on for years, and neither of us have done anything to hurt our loyalty.

She's been okay with me doing stuff with other people, as long as I'm honest with her about it and don't leave her for them. But I haven't, because I only want to if I feel enough connection and attraction and trust with someone else naturally to want to. Even now, I haven't found someone else other than her who I want to devote my love and lust for. It's deeper than just swinging, even if I'm not necessarily dating them. Though it's not off the table either, I just don't want to try to force a kind of connection that isn't there. There's a few cute coworkers here I'd like to try to find out if they're interested, but I'm worried about accidental harassing them. I want to be openly sexual and free, but I'm worried about creeping people out and making them feel unsafe. I don't want to harass anybody, but I want to stop holding myself back from being the serial flirt I want to be. Especially as a male who's mostly interested in females. I only want to engage in this behavior in a respectful and ethical way, that makes people feel good about themselves. Any advice on how to put myself out there and be open about my intentions without coming across as a pushy creep? I'd really appreciate it.

My girlfriend for a while didn't think she was interested in engaging in any behavior with anyone else but me. I accepted that, and didn't expect her to change her mind on that. But, she ended up developing an infatuation with a cool coworker of hers. We're in different departments of the same job, they work directly together. At first she didn't want to have the feelings and tried to deny it to herself, but he says and does things that makes her squirm too much she couldn't deny it. As soon as she realized what it was, she told me about it. I was super excited, because consensual partner sharing is a big kink of mine. He seems like a really good and awesome dude, and I'd say we're good friends by this point. Over the summer, they flirted a bit and fooled around a little, going about second base but not further. He seems pretty shy about opening himself up with her. They're both very shy people who don't seem to be used to getting what they want, and sometimes have a hard time knowing what to say to each other. But I talked with him a little about us being open and how I appreciate him being the one she feels like opening herself up to. They both like each other, maybe a bit more than just lust, but my girlfriend doesn't feel the same comfort with him like she does with me. I don't want to push her into anything she doesn't want to, and same goes with him. I want to respect his feelings and boundaries and comfort too, but he's a bit shy about directly addressing how he's feeling. I want to help encourage their growth, and give them a bit of a push to whatever degree they feel comfortable with, but I also want to respect their privacy and autonomy, and not try to control their relationship. I don't know, shit's complicated lol. Since we've gone back they clearly have a flirty connection still, but both are shyer about it than just before we left after the summer. She thinks of things she wants to do and say, but can't seem to allow herself to just do them. She gets shy and holds herself back. Which is really cute when she gets like that, but I can tell it's frustrating her and she wants to overcome it but doesn't know how. Hell I struggle with that too, but not about any specific person. Any advice on that would be appreciated too.

If anybody read thru that whole thing, I appreciate you and any input you might have. I hope you have a great rest of your day, or week even lol. Okay, rant over.