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5
I feel like I'm not loving myself enough
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Ewan ko ba pero feel ko di ko talaga minamahal sarili ko. I've diagnosed with hiv 2 years ago. I think the reason is that someone has intentionally infected me. After that, I refrained from having sex due to trauma and protecting myself from getting other stds. I'm adhering my treatment naman and reach undetectable status. Sabi ng mga friends ko rin na pwede naman ako makipag sex basta sa bf ko na daw. Pero recently, I can't control myself and decided to have sex again. Ewan ko ba pero feel ko yung naka hookup ko made me look dirty. Inis na inis ako sa kanya and inis na inis din ako sa sarili ko na di makapag control. Nabababuyan ako sa sarili ko. Hindi ko naman sya gusto physically pero dahil lang sa libog nakipagsex ako. I felt bad about myself for allowing others to do shit on me. I hate myself.

Sorry ang drama ko. Rant lang.

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1 month ago