I’m 25,Have an okay job, almost a breadwinner. And have really few friends. I have always felt ugly and unattractive my whole life. I only had one boyfriend that didn’t last long due to the pandemic. Since I was a young gay kid, I always set my mind that no one would ever romantically like, let alone love me for real because of how I look. This thought is paralyzing to the pt that sometimes, I don’t wanna go out of room even during my days off. I’ve had hookups who were really attractive guys and I didn’t know how I somehow managed to attract them. Maybe I am attractive for a hookup but not for a wholesome date? Idk. I’ve always looked down upon myself. It always feel like there’s something wrong with my overall physique. I workout at home, I eat good food and fast regularly. I never thought of looking for a relationship but there’s this voice inside me that becuase I am so unattractive, I would never experience genuine love. Ever.