“Di ako nakikipagusap sa pangit!”

That was the exact words from the guy I talked in the g-app. Nahuli niya talaga yung pikon. Syempre sumagot ako ang nakipag away kasi tangina niya.

He also said na ang panget ko and face mask pa lang panget na ko pano pa Kaya kapag bare face. Then siya raw poging-pogi na raw sila kahit kalahati pa lang ng daw ng mukha niya yung pinapakita niya. That really shookt me to my core. Kasi I know deep inside it’s true. I’m not conventionally attractive pero wouldn’t hurt him to be kind. Tangina. I was so ready to fight him. I’m ready to say hurtful words towards him. Yung mag mumukha talaga akong elitist. Tangina.

“Kadiring bakla?” Tangina niya. It sucks kasi you’ve been fighting for your community Pero sila mismo unn kumakalaban sa mga taong lumalaban sa kanila.

Tangina. I hate this feeling kasi I know deep inside I’m not pretty. I’m just masking it with confidence.

Grabe. I’m so down lately tapos siguro eto nail on the coffin. It hurts, it fucking hurts.

Tbh, that’s why I’m saving for a lot of procedures not really because of them but for me coz I don’t want to feel this way anymore.