Edit: Hi guys. First of all, I would like to say thank you to everyone who took their time to leave messages and their experiences below. I'm grateful, really, that there are people who care and share the same feelings I'm feeling right now. Reading all of your advice helps me think of how hard the decision I will be making really is. I will be lying to all of you if I tell you that I'm not thinking about doing it anymore. But I came to a conclusion that I want to live. I would always come back to this thread to read all of your messages whenever I feel like ending it all, hoping that it will always give me the strength to go on. Thank you, it means a lot to me.

My prof just reached out to me that I won't be able to apply for an extension and I'll probably be forced drop. Nireready ko naman na sarili ko for this outcome, pero ang sakit pa rin. I already have 2 subjects na 3.0 tapos dumagdag pa to.

I'm thinking of killing myself on the day of my birthday.

Sabi ko kasi, if I fail this class I'll take that as a sign to end all of this. Medyo nagkaroon ako ng hope kasi isang module na lang yung kailangan kong ipasa pero di talaga kinaya. Sobrang stressful talaga nitong sem na to para sakin and feeling ko sobrang useless ko saka bobo. I really tried my best to survive but sometimes it can never be enough.

The thing is, I have a scholarship na inaasahan lang din ng family ko. Di ko kayang harapin sila tapos sabihin na nawala ko yung scholarship ko. That I failed them.

Dumagdag pa na start na kagad ng classes sa Feb 7. Hindi ko pa nga nadidigest ng maayos tong sem na to....I'm just so so so tired.

Sorry for the rant but I really want to get this off.