I've been in the hospital since the 12th. I still mostly have had blood come out. Last night I had a tiny amount of stool come out. I've never been so excited about pooping. I sat up in my bed and immediately told my mom. I don't think I've pooped like a normal person a single time in my life. I've either needed enemas or I had to strain for a long time, but yesterday with the ostomy, it just came right out. It's such a weird thing to be excited about, but I think I'm going to get so much more done in life with less time in the bathroom.

The colorectal doctor this morning said I can go home when I'm having a normal amount of stool with a bowel movement. She thinks I may have become dependent on miralax after taking it for most of my life. She wants me to go back on the miralax today and thinks it's likely that'll work. I wouldn't be surprised if I'm dependent on the miralax. I was hoping I wouldn't need it anymore, but it's not a big deal. Surgery or not it seems like I'll always need it.

Last night I was starting to regret going through with the surgery honestly. With how little stool I've had I was worried about putting myself in an even worse position. Plus there was quite a bit of blood and I thought my stoma site was a bad color. It looked like a very dark red, but after they wiped away some of the blood it wasn't as fark. They said the stoma is a little darker than they would like it to be, but not a dangerous color. They also said since the stoma site looked fine they weren't concerned with the blood. I guess little shit was just being dramatic.

The blood was kind of scary because it looked like a lot of blood. When you see tablespoons of blood it seems like a lot and I haven't heard anyone online talk about the blood produced post-op. They reassured me that it wasn't as much as it seemed and said to start worrying if the bag is filling up with blood or if something looks wrong with the stoma site.

I guess at this point I'm pretty much documenting my hospital stay. It's boring. I occupy my time by watching the TV, talking to a guy I met online dating, building a Lego set, have my comfort plushie, filling in sudoku books, and being lazy sleeping my life away at times. Nothing productive, but I can't think of anything productive to do. College hasn't even started yet for me. It does start tomorrow though so if I'm still here at least I have something to do.