PREFACE

I am a woman who is searching online for sexual partners - I am going to get absolutely bombarded with responses from men! With so many guys responding, those who merely write one-liners in their introductions (e.g. “Hey there” or “I’m down”) and who don’t have any content in their profile history are guaranteed to not get noticed. So, if you are inspired by what I’ve written here and you feel inclined to introduce yourself, please take your time to do so properly. First off, please be bisexual (or, if you aren't comfortable with labels, please be excited about having some kind of sexual contact with guys, too.) Also, please be thoughtful about what you write (I promise to read everything) and tell me about yourself so that I can get some idea of who the person is behind the printed words on the screen. Furthermore, please tell me your location, stats, dreams, hobbies, etc…anything that will help me get a clearer understanding of who you are. Lastly, please include photos and let me know why it is exactly that you think we would be a good match. Now, we could talk all day about how ridiculously disproportionate and unfair the dynamic is of how much attention a woman gets when she posts a reddit ad versus how little a man gets and, while I do feel for you guys and I truly wish that these things were more equitable, I’m not the one who makes the world function in this way. I’m just a regular gal trying to have a little bit of fun before I wrinkle up and wither away. So, thank you in advance for taking time to read my thoughts ;) Now, onto the fun stuff!

There is something about ringing in the new year that makes me reflect on how blessed I am to have all of the wonderful things that I have in my life. I have a loving husband (who is also my best friend), two beautiful children, a lovely home, and my own business (doing what I love.) All of these things keep me busy enough to occupy my time 8 days a week! It is awesome and exhausting and overwhelming (all at the same time) and I couldn't ask for more. And, yet, here I am, asking for more...go figure.

I'm only human, of course, and despite having such a full life, I still do have the inevitable desires and fantasies (romantic, sexual, dirty...call them what you will) that come along with being human. I am fortunate to have a partner who encourages me to explore my desires and who also (luckily enough for me) actually gets excited when I fulfill them. As strange as it may sound to some, exploring my sexual desires with people other than my partner is actually really great for keeping the passion strong between him and I! Over the years, I have had men, women, and the occasional couple on the side that I have been lucky enough to call friends (with benefits.) Some I would meet alone and others I would meet along with my husband at times. These experiences have always been exhilarating (each in their own unique way), but they have also shown me what it is that I would really like to have in any future partners, too.

Experience has taught me that I prefer partners who also have their own lives, filled with ambitions and passions and people that they love, but who also inevitably have that itch to have their own fantasies and desires fulfilled. Because I have so much on my plate with running a business, being a wife and mother, and trying to keep my house (and the rest of my life) clean and orderly, I just don't have enough free time for a whirlwind romance. If I am going to balance work and family with occasional playtime, it is realistically only reasonable to expect to meet every two or three weeks. This won't be enough for a lot of the single men out there, I know, so I'm hoping to find those special guys who will be able to look forward to the times that we get to spend together on occasion without going crazy in between. So, perhaps you are single with a guy friend who you fool around with and both of you would be excited to bring a woman into the mix; or perhaps you are in a relationship (like me) and you really want more excitement in your life (preferably with a partner who knows what you are looking to do and who approves - or even better, a partner who wants to participate!); or perhaps you are single and lonely, but the idea of hitting it off with an older woman who would be excited about finding us another boyfriend that we could share together just sounds amazing! Who knows? Let me know why you think that this kind of friendship sounds like a perfect fit for you ;)

Personally speaking, my most frequent and intense fantasies usually revolve around being with two (or more) men at the same time, so I'm looking for a man/men who is excited about helping me to embrace that inner slut who just wants to be wanted by two or three horny (yet respectful) gentlemen. In my fantasy, these guys are bisexual (bicurious, heteroflexible, etc…call it whatever you want), so we all can feel free to touch and kiss one another and take turns being the center of attention. So, if you read this whole post and you decide that you want to say hello, please realize that you will absolutely need to be comfortable with and attracted to both men and women on some level. If I find what I'm really hoping to find, I will have a few men who I will meet with a couple of times a month, sometimes all of us together at once (lucky me) and sometimes just one-on-one (because one of the other guys is at the river and the other has family visiting from out of town, etc.) Whatever the case, I would like a small group of trusted friends who will be happy to meet occasionally, but regularly, and develop some sexual chemistry together.

I love all types of men, but what generally gets my attention is a man who has a solid combination of several of the following qualities:

-Respectful (toward everyone, not just the ones from whom he stands to gain something)

-Confident (not cocky or over-confident or egotistical, mind you...there is a notable difference between someone who has the intelligence and life experience to trust their own abilities to be up to the task of dealing with particular challenge and someone who blindly and brazenly believes that he can do absolutely anything that he sets his mind to just because he is so much more awesome than everyone else)

-Humble (this is sort of the flip-side of confidence...the part of one's self that realizes he is just one of billions of tiny little creatures on a big rock that is floating in an even bigger universe of countless other rocks; many have come before him and many will come after he is gone; he is fortunate to have what little time he has in this life to struggle and to strive and, hopefully, to have some fun, too!)

-Good-natured (he could be fun or funny, full of energy and exuberance, or chill and comfortable, but above all else he should be an individual who is generous and kind and full of good will toward his fellow man)

-Open-minded (I’m pretty sure that the most common fantasy for most men is to be with two women at the same time; in that fantasy, I’m pretty sure that part of what makes the fantasy so fun is that the girls are into each other and into you, right? It would kinda suck if the girls weren’t into each other, right? Well, I feel the same way about threesomes with two guys; it’s just super hot when the guys are into playing with each other, too!)

-Has healthy self-esteem (if a man can't respect and love himself, how could I realistically expect him to ever treat me or anyone else with respect and kindness?)

-Gets pleasure from giving pleasure (porn that is made by men for men has really perpetuated a lot of ideas about sex that are about as realistic as an Avengers movie; I don't have any particular desire to be humiliated and pounded like a jackhammer in every position for hours on end until I'm so numb that I can't feel anything at all; my body is sensitive and my erogenous zones are even more so, and thus I get pleasure from a gentler, more deliberate and sensual kind of love-making; let's each focus on giving the other what gives them the most pleasure and we'll all be happy!)

-Patience (I imagine that most guys who are perusing the personal ads on reddit are likely kinda half looking for someone to meet and kinda half just looking at what’s out there and using what they find as masturbation material; let’s face it, it is a hell of a lot easier to fantasize about meeting someone (sparks are flying instantly, clothes come flying, best sex ever, etc.) than it is to actually meet a complete stranger in real life and find a genuine connection; that’s because meeting people is hard…we all have stresses and moods and problems that just don’t exist in the fantasy world; there are sexually transmitted diseases in the real world that the fantasy world doesn’t have to even take into consideration! So, with that said, I’m looking to meet in real life and, personally speaking, I grow attracted to someone in real life after we have spent some time hanging out and learning about one another's thoughts, dreams, experiences, philosophies about life, etc.; character and personality are crucial components of attraction and there just aren't any shortcuts to gaining trust and establishing intimacy...it takes time)

There are plenty of other generic qualities that interest me that I could list (e.g. tall, handsome, athletic, well-endowed, rugged, refined, sophisticated, etc...you know, just your regular everyday former college athlete turned fireman with a masters degree in philosophy who does personal training on the side and, though he doesn't attend feminist rallies or other protests in the name of equality, he certainly supports their sentiments), but I have found that trying to imagine a person that I will be attracted to sets the most ridiculous and unrealistic expectations that would be impossible to fulfill! So, I'm really interested in people who are trying to be their best selves and finding out if we have some things in common. From there, we can see if there are any sparks between us and move forward accordingly :) If you have made it this far and you feel inclined to strike-up a conversation with me, please send me a message with the words "spring is in the air" in the subject line (so that I can easily separate your message from the hundreds that I expect to get from guys who didn't have the courtesy to actually read my post before contacting me.) Please tell me if you have actually had experiences with other men or if it is just something that you have fantasized about (either one is fine, I just want to get an idea of where you’re coming from) and what your turn-ons and turn-offs are when it comes to men (e.g. top, bottom, versatile, kissing, just doing it because you know that it excites me, etc.) Also, please include photos so that I can start to form a mental image of the individual with whom I'm chatting :)

Now, I'm no spring chicken, and I'm really just a regular 48-year-old woman who tries her best to stay in decent shape, but who still has the wrinkles, the gray hairs, and all of the other less-than-perfect traits that come along with aging. Again, I do try to keep myself as attractive as possible (and I think that I do a pretty decent job of it), but I just want to set realistic expectations. On the flip side, I won't have unreal expectations for you, either, but please be someone who makes a reasonable effort to be the best version of yourself that you can be.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my want ad that reads like a short novel. I know from experience that my inbox will be flooded with responses, so it might take me a while to work through them all, but I will try my best to respond to all respectful and thoughtful messages :)

This is me: https://imgur.com/lcvhIfI