I 31 male and my wife 27 female are having a disagreement about parenting that I need to know if I’m being the A Hole or if I am in the right.

My wife and I normally parent very similarly. Our son, who will be 4 in January, tends to respect and listen to my wife a lot more than he listens to me. It is not for lack of trying on my part. My wife on multiple occasions while iv attempted to parent my child in a way that she sees unfit, has stepped in and overridden me, told me that my parenting was not okay, or has told me to stop while in front of our son, who then immediately disrespects me and then for the foreseeable future will not listen to me, acts out around me, and misbehaves because he has no respect for me due to his mother showing him that he doesn’t have to have respect for me because she doesn’t have respect for me when I parent. Yes I understand sometimes I may be in the wrong, but I truly believe that as parents that is a conversation to be had after you parent your child when you and your spouse are away from the child and in private so that your child sees you and your spouse as a united front instead of seeing one parent disrespecting the other and showing the child it is okay to do the same.

Tonight this happened again and I got extremely angry and started yelling and got very angry because this is the 4th time in the last 2 months my wife has done this to me and my son has had worse and worse behavior with me after each time she has done this. She believes she needs to step in immediately when she sees something she doesn’t agree with and doesn’t see things the same way I do and I am becoming extremely frustrated. So Reddit, am I the A Hole for getting angry and for feeling this way?