I am feeling sad. For no *particular* reason at this moment, but I can't shake it off.

I don't have anyone to tell it irl. Usually at times like these I tend to reach out to dark sad places. But.. I am trying to not go there. Usually they involve self-destructive thoughts and engaging with others similarly minded. Sometimes venting, sometimes supporting each other, and sometimes encouraging / validating each others self-destructive/dark tendencies without really doing that actively.

I don't want to go there rn, I don't want to fall in a trap and I don't feel like I have the energy to lift people up either. I don't know what to do. It won't leave my mind. I don't want to chase and shoo the blues away. Just want someone to pass through it with.