(M23) I failed all my courses this semester I’ve been failing school since, I was a child. My parents will force me to study but I just can’t. I’m not that good socially and didn’t know how to ask for help. I’m always been left behind. and continued life through trauma responses. I dropped out of high school and was a NEET (NEET, an acronym for "Not in Education, Employment, or Training", refers to a person who is unemployed and not receiving an education or vocational training.) for 4 years. Last year I moved out and living with my uncle, He helped me finish my GED and I’m employed at his store . He tells me odd jobs are not the future and I need to get a degree to get a better job which is true. I got into community college. He motivated me to get back into education and suggested me to be a nurse. My classes were online and i slacked off idk why. Ik it doesn’t make sense while i write this but i couldn’t study, my mind wont focus or i would get lost. He has helped me a lot and he believes in me but I’m failing. Yesterday i told him I’ve failed and ik it broke his heart. I want to change i want to know what to do. I don’t want to get lost again and again and hurt the people close to me . I am the definition of a loser. And I have lost track of everything. Idk what to say or what to do. Ik its up to me and i have to help myself and study and build my carrier, i believer i have received enough help and support but couldn’t produce any results. It gets worse if i compare myself with my peers or family, i am behind and idk how to pull up, i keep losing my mind, i am losing everything and cant feel anything anymore. Its all me and i am a loser, always have been one. I’ve asked for another semester

I feel like Simon from lord of the flies, Boo Radley from to kill a mockingbird, Nemo nobody from the film mr nobody, Fry from Futarama, Forest from Forest gump. John the savage from Brave New world.

I have not got any psychiatric evaluation yet but I bet, i have all the problems that stop me from studying, making friends enjoying life and making the most from what i have.

I’m giving one more try Thank you for reading Appreciate you.