Hi, so…Nsfw talk ahead. I’m 24 irl btw.

Ever since I was little I’ve loved the feeling of being tied up. I used to watch shows like Penelope Pitstop and Scooby Doo where the girls were always getting kidnapped. I’m a trans guy so at the time I saw myself as a girl when I didn’t know what trans was and all that- I digress.

I used to (and still do) tie myself up and just sit there, content. I know this part is relatively normal. I have trauma from r*pe, parental abuse and more and I’ve heard that it’s common in submissive people to genuinely enjoy being tied up even nonsexualy. But that’s not really what I’m worried about.

I’m worried because I genuinely have this deep desire to be a slave to someone. Not even just sexually. I love to please others and make them happy. I’m a very hyper sexual person in general. And I’m so submissive. I can see myself being mentally fulfilled just living a simple life as a slave for someone and having absolutely no freedom. It’s genuinely what I want and I’ve wanted it for years. I have a small business that I could still run from home. So I’ve obviously still thought about ways to still be able to make a living.

Longterm, I know it’s not the best idea. But I can’t ever shake this feeling that it’s my purpose. And even worse, I can’t find anyone that I can truly feel not judged telling. I am incredibly kinky and cannot have a vanilla relationship. I have some depraved albeit non illegal kinks. I just worry I will never find someone who is as kinky and as devoted to this lifestyle as me. And I worry that I’ll never stop feeling this way so I’ll always be so unhappy and unsatisfied.

Thank you