This has been a feeling I've been living with for a while, but my recent playthrough of Slay The Princess really pushed me over the edge and made me wonder if I'm alone in this.

As a long time reader, gamer, and someone who overall loves to peruse stories in any medium, I've always been smitten by the messages and emotions the good ones convey. After the end of hours and hours of playthrough of my favorite single-player (mostly) games, wherein the story had me glued to the edge of the seat, I feel sadness at the ending of the journey. It's not devastating, hurtful sadness, or one that I'd ever avoid, but rather I'd imagine its the sadness pretty much everyone feels when such a journey ends and you're left with the empty void of that story. It's a sadness that basically says "Even though its over, I'm glad I got to experience that". The loss of characters I particularly enjoyed weighs heavy, just as the final happy ending fills me with joy and a sense of closure, and overall I am left appreciating the design of the story and wishing I could simply erase the memories from my brain and live the emotions for the first time all over again. That's even the inspiration behind my username, ChasingtheJourney, because I find myself chasing those "journeys" with ever increasing intensity. After I finished the Mass Effect trilogy, I didn't game for 2 weeks because nothing in my library felt like it would measure up. The Eragon book series put me in a "book hole" for a month in high school. And don't even get me started on romance series.

My problem is that I know those stories are supposed to mimic the emotions one would feel in in real life. Granted its not like you're living happily ever after, shortly after you've slain the dragon and saved the world, but I'd imagine the feeling of triumph, sadness, perseverance, and ultimately a period of emptiness after the end of a proverbial chapter in your life is what is supposed to happen. Followed by wishing you could relive it all over again for the first time.

But I don't.

Yes I've been happy, and sad, and wanted to relive the past, but never with the same intensity as I do following the conclusion of one of those great stories. Real life just feels....muted, and no matter how high "the highs" soar, or how low "the lows" stoop, the feelings are just never as intense. I supposed that might be why so many people escape into fictional worlds, but honestly I'm just worried that something is wrong with me and I'm missing some emotional component that makes normal people appreciate life in a way I can't.

Thank you for reading :)