My ex and I were together last 5 years ago. Near the end of our relationship, we were off and on. She was having me over and sleeping with me but we weren’t having sex during this stint. She wanted to make sure she trusted me. Meanwhile (without my knowledge) she was seeing other guys. I had a feeling she was doing this so I was a little sneaky, trying to see her messages or pics to see if she was seeing others.

During one sleepover, I had a feeling she had someone over a night or two before me. While she was asleep, I found a pack of magnums under her bed. Then I found a used one in her bathroom trash can. It made me angry, sad, and kinda turned on. I tried to confront her, but I beat around the bush about it. Later on I snuck into her phone and found messages to her best friend about this new guy. She said they had slept together and she mentioned he was packing heat. She sent a picture of her forearm as a reference. I was so angry, emasculated, and kinda turned on.

I ended up asking her about it all, because I confronted her about the condom, and she told me about the guy. Said she had so much trouble putting on a condom and that it was like trying to fit a blimp inside of her. At the time that was tmi but I have fantasized about it for 5 years since. She told me she liked my size way more but I still wish she was with more blimps.

I think I want to be a stag but my current partner (hopefully forever partner) doesn’t have the sexual drive or confidence for that. Bummer