I am okay, but just feeling a sense of despair.

Because I am an avoidant and I have watched life pass me by. I also see myself as far and ugly. And see myself as someone who is misunderstood. It is better than the alternative of trying and knowing that is what you are… oh god that is sooo lame. Ugh I can not even bear an ounce of pain. I dunno what I’m doing. This all just feels so empty and lonely. I think I am a failure or a poor pathetic sad sap in my family. It is because of me that the weak have to be supported. I am below average. I am a burden. I am unworthy.

I wonder what causes human beings to have such feelings? Why is this the status quo and not something else? How the fuck do we break out of this?

Fuck my life, ruck that Reddit is the only place I feel like I can say this to some other living being. Fuck that I’ve so caught up ⬆️ n my feelings. Fuck that I do not go for what all of want! Fuck that I do not recognize that I’m shallow. Fuck me. Fuck you. Fuck such self entitlement. Fuck such self pity and wasted human potential. Fuck all of us for being so judgmental of each other. Hope we can improve slowly.