Hey y'all, sorry in advance for the rambling - the situation feels so complicated so I'm going to go ahead and #getthisoffmychest
So, my S/O and I have been going out for 3 years, moving in together after about 8 months. The whole time, I (m,29) have been the provider for her (f, 25). I have ZERO doubt in my mind that she's just with me for the money - I don't even make THAT much as it is, lol. ANYWAYS - it's been a constant theme for us - me asking her/urging her (sometimes super cordial/sensitive, other times super blunt) to get a new job because the one she currently works just isn't cutting it. (Only getting a few shifts a week at minimum wage). She also does not have a car -- this will make more sense in a sec.
Like I mentioned, since we've lived together, I've always paid the lion's share of rent (if not all some months) and for all of our food, 90% of nights out, etc. She helps when she can, but that's pretty few and far between. We had our own apartment which she'd pitch in about 15-25% of rent a month, so we decided to move into a guest house with her Grandparents for a fraction of the rent.
Now, she just asked me if I could spot her portion of the rent HERE, TOO so that she can save up for a car. Honestly, it's not so much the principle as much as the prior history that pisses me off about this. I wouldn't mind if she SHOWED ME efforts in the past to get a new job (trying out a few new ones, applying all of the time, etc.) - but at this rate; I just feel like it's going to be a lost cause bc she's not even going to be able to save up for a new car, and I'll just be stuck with more bills on my end.
And I know I might seem selfish here - but the whole reason I'm penny pinching/saving is so that I can provide for us and our future! Because yes, I do see a future for us - I've pretty much already decided that - because I f*cking love this woman and she is the one - there's just this huge blockage there that just can't seem to be squared away.
If you read this far (thank you) and have any advice/help, you're more than welcome to share :)
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