I’m a recent college grad and just moved to the city for my current job a year and a half ago right after graduation. Since moving here I’ve been very fortunate to establish several somewhat good social circles. Though not the best looking guy in the room, I know I look good (Asian, short, toned/muscular body) so I don’t have a lot of problems to get hookups. I would say I’m a pretty well-rounded person with a diversity of interests. I love going to circuit and warehouse parties, very sex-positive, but also I enjoy outdoor stuff, read, go to museums, etc. That being said, I quickly realized many people in my circles, either friends or fwb tend to fall into more extreme sides, either party animals/circuit queens or homebodies and such. And as a POC, many times I feel tokenized or fetishized by the same people I originally thought were cool. Though I’ve made some very good friends and gone a some good date, I feel like I have to compartmentalize myself depending on the people I’m with. Basically, the point of this post is just me venting why it is so hard to find people with diverse interests like me to hang out or date. As much as I love partying, I also love to read books together, discuss about them, go on walks, etc. And as much as I love to stay at home playing piano or watching a movie, I also love to go to Basement and not leave until 4am. But it’s been feeling like I have to pick one option for a group of friends or a date.