CALL LOGS

Paradise. One word. A thousand meanings. To me, it’s burning the forest and everything in it and walking through the ashes. But first, you need to answer a question and know why I want to destroy everything. Would you rather know when you were going to die or how you were going to die? I hadn’t asked myself that question, I should have, It might have helped. It's hard when you don’t control your destiny, I thought I did, even with the big man on my side. Still, that just goes to show that I was alone, right until the end.

Howard, my manager, pulled me into his office and started prattling on about some Eden retreat. I didn’t hear much, Megan had just stopped by the water cooler. A string of spiders crept out her hair and entered her ear. I shivered uncontrollably when they vacated her nose. The fucking fallen. “Dawson!”

I span round to Howard's flushed cheeks. “Are you listening or are you eyeing up Megan?” I snorted. Megan was the last thing on my mind, after Cosmia… “I’m sorry, Howard. Go on,” I adjust the chair so the view of the door was behind me. The iron-grey sky above London painted the window in a monotone drabness, just like Howard's voice. Howard came across and put a sympathetic hand on my shoulder. I looked into the man’s watery eyes.

“We know you are taking Cos…” “Don’t say it, man,” I stood sharply, the chair falling backwards, and went to the window. “We’re all grieving here, Bison. Cosmia was one of our best. I know you guys had something special but it’s time to let her go. We have. It’s a healthy thing to do.”

Let her go! I thought. It’s been all of four days, and he’s acting like she’s been gone for months. Inside me, the rage bubbled threatening to spill. My hands grew hot, I knew if I looked at them I would see the glow of the holy fire beneath my skin.

“What do you need me for, Howard?” I said in a measured tone. I didn’t need him to have another excuse to send me to a therapy session. “I'm sending you to the Eden retreat with Mickey and Abbie. Matthew was supposed to go but seeing how he’s ghosting us I have no choice.” “Eden?”

Just then the phone rang. Howard picked it up and in seconds his face drained of colour. “Really? Okay then, and the monkey? I will bear that in mind. Thank you.” Howard placed the phone down, his attention on something only he could see. I coughed. “Ah, Dawson. I wanted to congratulate you on being the new floor manager.” It was like our conversation had never taken place. “Congratulations.”

Before I knew what was happening the look came back into Howard's eyes and he was shaking my hand vigorously trying to propelling me toward the door, I felt sorry for the small man, clearly the stress what getting the better of him. First, the old branch burning down, and the death of all the employees, then the new office and Cosmia. I decided not to put my weight behind me and instead I let him push me out of his office.

“It's your task now,” he panted. “My task?” “Yes. I want you to figure out what the hell is going on over there. Your flight leaves tomorrow morning 08:15. Grab the details from Vee on the front desk, I think it’s a DF something another.”

The door slammed shut on my face. That was the last time I saw Howard before I left. Have you flown from London to America? It sucks. It double sucks that the flight was changed because the pilot broke his leg and then I was placed in cattle class with no extra legroom. Dishevelled isn’t the right word for the state I arrived in. Angry. Cramped. Pissed off. The saving grace was Doug and the company retreat car. Although we nearly didn’t make it.

Somewhere about an hour out from the airport, we drove through a forest of binding trees. When all of a sudden we heard an almighty explosion. A gigantic tree had fallen from the side of the road and slammed into the car behind. We tried our best to help the poor family, but they were already dead before the ambulance arrived. Seeing the young girl's angelic face reminded me of Cosmia, and my heart sank. Why didn’t I see this coming like all the other times? Were my abilities gone? I could have saved her like I could have saved Cosmia. She would probably be with me right now if I did, complaining that I was taking up too much room and jabbing me in the ribs while really just trying to get closer to me. I thought we had something, a connection, something like soulmates but soulmates don’t lie to each other. I shook the feeling off as Doug, my bespectacled friend, motioned with a hand. “Are we almost there,” Doug said. I nodded and gave him the thumbs up.

Soon, we passed under a large wooden sign that read EDEN, and all of a sudden I felt sick. The car hadn’t even stopped before I was emptying the flight meals all over the American wilderness. When I finally looked up, it was at a pair of black DM. My eyes slid up over the smooth pale legs and what looked like a dyed black wedding dress to a clammy face, the feeling washed away and was replaced by dread.

“Thank you, Doug. I can take it from here. Mr Dawson, I’m Peggy. I’m going to be giving you the tour of the Eden retreat,” she motioned to the trees. I squinted through the thin bushes nervously at the glimmering surface of a lake. “Mr Albright likes for our important personnel to have the grand entrance into Eden,” She said jabbing a thumb at a small boat. I thought I like water, damn the River Thames runs through London, that makes us practically sea folk, but being on the boat with Peggy. I’ve never been so sick. Doug didn’t seem bothered, he smiled all the way. I spewed again over the side of the boat. Through watery eyes, I saw the oily green faces peered up at me. I shot back. “What’s the matter, Mr Dawson? Scared of a little water?” Peggy winked and laughed. I looked again and saw nothing but my sweaty face mirrored in the water. I swallowed the lump forming in my throat.

Doug tapped me on the back and pointed up ahead. "Now that's an entrance." And he was right. I imagine they wanted the effect that warped my face. I imagine what they were going for was to take their visitors breathes away. It did. It was otherworldly beautiful, with large overlapping trees, sunlight sparkling off glass upon glass upon glass, this was paradise. And it felt wrong. When we landed it was by a huge glass entrance. The two electric doors slid back to a gigantic reception desk surrounding a huge old tree. The branches seem to be one with the structure of the retreat, as if it wasn't built around it but rather with it. I saw a quick flash of neon pink disappear around a corner and then someone grabbed my shoulder.

“Mr Dawson!” I turned to Peggy’s clammy smile and dark-rimmed eyes. The black eyeliner under her eyes like a bleak void letting her soul oozes out. “Please feel free to get settled in. I’ve taken the liberty of preparing a delicious care package that’s waiting for you in your room, the restaurant is down there to the right, and the bar is on the left. Mr Albright wanted me to tell you that a meeting has been set for tomorrow at 9 am. Please try and make it, although if you don’t we will understand. Eden, after all, has so many luxuries one could quite simply vanish.” Peggy chuckled and turned to walk away.

Doug and his big rimmed glasses grinned at me. He poked me in the chest, then touched it to his and gave me a pat on the arm. "You, me, we're buddies," he said before walking off. I didn’t know how I felt about that. But I knew one thing. This place was giving me the creeps.

It was like that for most of the week, whenever I turned around Doug was there. Grinning. I couldn’t take it anymore. I was miles away from home, well out of my comfort zone and completely alone.

I thought back to when that wasn’t a problem. Before I met Cosmia, before Brighter Futures, before I realised my destiny. I had to find out what these people were doing here at this retreat, for her sake at the least. On the surface, it seemed like just a bunch of executives enjoying the luxuries of the company’s expense account. But the fallen were here, I knew it even if I couldn’t sense it.

I slipped out of my room after eating the meal Peggy had given me, which was as she said, delicious, and left the retreat under the cover of night. Stalking out into the forest, I didn’t know exactly what I was looking for. I just knew I had to be out here for some reason. That reason dropped a pineapple on my head and grunted. “Atlas? What are you doing here? Where’s Moe?”

Atlas swung down from the branch and handed me a plastic key card emblazoned with an Auset logo. It was some pharmaceutical company. Atlas grunted again and pulled at my hand and lead me through the undergrowth. About two metres in I stumbled over Moe.

He was dead. Like proper dead. Rotting and decomposing dead. Maggots crawling out of his eyes and nose dead. I knelt in the dirt, flicked off the bugs crawling around his eyeballs and closed his eyelids. It didn’t make sense. When I left BFSH, they were still there. How did they get here so quickly and why did Moe seem like he had been dead for months? Atlas hugged me and I knew then how much he missed his friend. I pulled back and looked him in the eye.

“Who did this, Atlas?” The monkey covered his eyes. “You didn’t see them?” Atlas nodded, then pulled another square piece of plastic from the pocket of his waistcoat. This time it was an ID badge. Warren Price. I didn’t know who that was, but they were going to pay when I found them. My internal fire was slowly rising to my fingers, Atlas tugged at my arm and beckoned me onwards. I regained control but the hand holding the branch of a tree left a smouldering handprint.

After a ten minute trudge through the thickening foliage, we came across a clearing. I could see the lake we had come in on and also an old broken signpost that read: Eden. But what really drew my attention was a pair of dirt-brown bomb door sunken, deep into the earth around a gigantic tree. Adrenaline was shocking my system. I had to stop and regain control. I suddenly felt weak, and dizzy. I knew I would find whoever killed Moe inside, and I also knew whatever BFSH were up to, I’d find my answers inside too.

I pressed the card Atlas had given me against the entry pad. The metallic swirl of the mag-lock whined and then clunked. The heavy door swung open to a dim pulsing red evacuation light and my skin started to crawl. It looked like some sort of a catastrophe had happened inside. Glass sparkled everywhere like a million stars on a velvet blanket, most of it was from the glass partitions and the rest from testing tubes, vials and other experimental equipment.

Atlas barreled in as if he knew where he was going, his disappearing form melting into the shadows of the blinking red light. I raced after him to a small room. Picture dotted the wall. It was hard to see in the dim light, but as I drew closer, I was able to make them out. Finger painting of trees and flowers, dogs and cats. The pictures you expect of children, fat bodies and stick legs. Atlas had stopped and was cuddling something fluffy. I moved on, addressing each picture. Until I found Atlas. Not the monkey at my knee but a portrait tacked to the wall. A self-portrait.

“You’ve been here before?” Atlas nodded and held out the fluffy toy. A shabby, well-loved dog labelled Rusty. He hugged it again and rested it under his chin. “They did tests on you, didn’t they?” Atlas nodded.

“Did they test anyone else?” He nodded again. “Me?” He nodded a third time. Atlas took my hand and led me out and through some sliding doors. Rows of empty cells lined either wall. We walked passed them, some held remnants of their former owners like dark smears I suspected was blood, One held a tattered discarded hospital shift. But what got to me the most was a few held the old occupancy. Three, what looked like ladies with long silver hair, were prostrated on the walls. Arms pinned out wide, legs crossed and pinned at the ankles. A crown of thrones rested on their heads. In the corner of each of the room were three vials of Tetheret. I didn’t know what the drug did, but it must have killed the poor things.

Suddenly the room went cold, the blinking red light shut off and I was plunged into darkness. I heard the movement of fabric across the wall. Fear shot up my spine and I felt the warmth of the fire inside me once again. Maybe the bunker didn’t dampen my abilities as the retreat did? I called the fire inside me and it sprang to my hands. It was dim, wavering. Something was wrong. Maybe it was the proximity of the retreat, I couldn't be sure. The dim illumination showed three sets of gleaming silver eyes. A vibrant green tinge ringing them gave them an evil look. I swallowed as the full power of their stare penetrated me. I blinked and was back in the room, only this time I wasn't alone, and the room wasn’t abandoned but rather full of scientists and personnel.

“Ok, Mr Noahsson, is it?” Said a man in a white lab coat. “Ah, you are here for the trails, yes?” “I think so, Mr…?” I said, trying to place the face. “Doctor...Doctor Ralph, We will see how you fare with the first set of trails. Tell me, Mr Noahsson…”

“...Japheth.”

“Quite. Japheth, tell me. Do you have any next of kin?” “Well, I mean I have relatives, but none that are close, if you know what I mean...” I said rubbing the back of my neck. “...Good! Okay, well, just rest up and a nurse will be along to administer your first dose.” The doctor moved off, a blonde lady came towards me with a syringe gun with a vial of green at the back. I watched helplessly as she hit me in the arm, A warm sensation ran down to my hand and across my chest, then the vision faded like a sheet of rain. I stared at my hands, I had been here before, In this room. Atlas had been here before too, it made me wonder how many other Brighter Future employees had had the same treatment? An alarm sounded out in the hall. I knew I had to move but I wanted proof. Under the pulsing light, I made a quick search of an office which yielded two results. One was a vial unlike the others full of a white liquid labelled: Origin, that I found in the back of a drawer full of notes. The other was a magenta folder at the top of that drawer containing the doctor’s research papers. What I found most interesting was my name across the first page in bold letters. Japheth Noahsson.

My skin started to crawl. They had taken my angelic blood from me, experiment on me, on the holiness in my veins and on what I could only imagine. I remembered escaping with Moe, and Atlas through their portals. But something went wrong. We, I had fallen.

The fury building within me finally came to a boiling point. I clenched my fists and screamed in rage. Before I knew it I was grabbing equipment and hurling it about. This entire place was an abomination and I was going to destroy every bit of it if I could.

I smashed the monitors and pulled the wires. Alarms continued to blare and whine. Then at last, the room became quiet. I stood there, transfixed by the destruction I had caused. Was this what Howard sent me for? To bring an end to this evil?

A sickly voice rang out in the pulsing red light. “Oh, Dawson! Time to come out now. You know we’ve been following you. It was ok when you didn’t know, but you killed Cosmia. That’s was a no-no. You know that we can’t allow you to leave...again.”

Peggy moved under the pulsing red siren. Her gothic appearance doused in the crimson light doing little to add to the already creepy vibe of the bunker, and herself.

“What do you want with me?” “Oh, darling. We don’t want anything from you, not anymore. You did all you needed to do right here. Now, You’re just a loose end that needs tying up. Say, how was the meal I laid out for you?” I felt the tiredness seeping into my bones as she spoke.

“Y-y-you poisoned me?”

“Yes, deary, of course, I did.” I felt a presence behind me and turned to see Doug’s perpetual grin emerge out of the shadows. He put a hand on my shoulder, I barely had the strength to do anything but stand.

“It’s lovely how you’ve both came down here to die, seeing as this is the place where it all started. You can keep the monkey," he said. "He's no use to us.” Suddenly I saw Atlas collapse on the ground beside me, limp as a rag doll.

“You’re just gonna let me die down here?” “Short answer? Yes.” She said looking at her fingernails.

Doug pushed passed me. Peggy laughed and turned to follow him out. I heard the crash of the bunker door and the metal clink of the mag locks driving home. I stumbled to a nearby desk and collapsed into a chair. The monitor came to life.

So, I’ve got to get this out there so you all know what’s happening at the Eden retreat. It’s a sham! They are killing people, only a few will survive what’s to come and it looks like I’m not one of them.

We are stuck and I am dying. I just wish Cosmia was here with me. I would tell her I’m sorry and that she gave me something I’ve never had for a long time. I hope this finds the right people. I don’t have long…

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