Title: (SHORT ESSAY) Gendered Role Reversal In Non-Monogamy: What The Intersectionality Of Gendered Role Reversal, The Pluri Spectrum And The A-Spectrum Can Be Like

I decided to write this short essay as a way of opening up and commenting my thoughts and feelings, as someone who is part of the Pluri/P-Spectrum, which encompasses r/Polysexual, polyromantic, r/Polyamorous and/or polygender people, and as someone that is also part of the A-Spectrum, which encompasses r/Asexual, r/Aromantic and/or r/Agender people, about what gendered r/RoleReversal can look like in r/NonMonogamy, in a very broad sense.

Long story short, last week, I met a woman that charmed me out of my "lesbian sheepitude" (when you love someone but do not make a move), what I mean is that there has been a long time ever since the last time I felt motivated enough to pursue and woo someone, besides things not working for us the way I fantasized, she woken in me fantasies that until then I have never thought of.

There has been some time ever since the last time I tried to figure out what gender, love, relationships and life could look like for me being a panamorous (literally pan polyamorous) person, in another words, as someone who desires to be more than friends, simultaneously and consensually, with more than one person, regardless of gender identities, but only until lately I did not have put much effort into imagining what gendered roles and their reversal can look like specifically in non-monogamy.

What I only recently figured out that I wanted was to have an open polyamorous intimate network with, at least, one woman, in which, instead of us serving men in a competition for their affections inside an hierarchy of relationships, as we were usually raised to pursue in the world we live in, I instead fantasize about being more than friends with, at least, one woman, together in a polyamorous relationship, in which we value more as a priority our relationship with one another, as in men not being the center of our (social and love) lives.

I wish I was more than friends with, at least, one woman in a relationship that was an open polyamorous intimate network because that means that we would be free to be more than friends, in the most broad and diverse sense, with how many other people we could love, that way we do not have to struggle with feeling pressured to be the "only one everything" to fulfill all the wants and needs of anyone, specially since I am also an asexual person, however I still desire a relationship also in which we could share a lot between each other, even being as intimate as sharing and exchanging other lovers with one another.

I think that I also have a kink for sharing, besides a kink for femdom, because of that, alongside feeling compersion, "the opposite of jealousy", in another words, I feel pleasure for other individuals feeling pleased, specially women.

Not only just that, but I also realized that I desire to be as intimate as being able to see, at least, one woman dominate, even sexually, the men that could come into our lives to serve us then leave us whenever they want, because they would also have their freedom, but that would not bother us, because, in the end of the day, her and I would still have one another to support and protect each other against the world, while still maintaining our independence from each other, as in wanting each other but not needing each other.

Ultimately, this is not the same but is more than the harem manly fantasy of power, I cannot fantasize of anything more reversal in general than deprioritizing living to serve men in a monogamous heteronormative relationship placed above all other types of relationships inside an hierarchy in which all genders, loves and social relationships exist in.

Besides, I also already fantasized about turning my open polyamorous intimate network into a sustainable cottagecore commune, however, also reimagining the ways in which existence is produced and reproduced is a topic for another moment.

Thanks for listening, if you read everything I wrote, just some food for a lot of thoughts.