I am in a bit of a crisis, and need some serious advice.

Last summer, after months of dwelling on the idea, I approached my wife about my long time fantasy. Seeing her be intimate with another man. After a few weeks of talking it over, she agreed to do it, and the hunt for the right man began.

Early in September, she met a guy online, they hit it off, and the three of us all met in person. We all got along well. We told him about our hotwife fantasy, and him possibly fulfilling it. He mentioned he is “ENM/Polyamorous.” He explained this to my wife and I, and my wife seemed very interested in what that was all about. Over the next month of them talking and being intimate twice, my wife approached me about this. She told me she feels this is what she feels she is inside, and wants to have multiple relationships in a caring and intimate sense. I was a little surprised, but also turned on by the idea. But, I told her, now that this is what you want, I think its is best and only fair that we open the marriage, so I can enjoy a woman as well if i meet one. For me, more in a casual meetup sense. Dinner dates, watching tv, doing fun things together, with occasional fooling around of course. A friend to enjoy, with benefits second.

My wife, with a little hesitation, agreed to do it. She said she never really wanted me with another woman, but realized, now that she changed the game, and its only fair i get to enjoy someone as well, in a less “detailed” situation than hers.

From October until now, my wife has seen a lot of attention and action. Me? I had one woman for two weeks in December with two lunch dates. I last saw her January 1, and since then I have hand absolutely no luck. My wife, “on average” with her highs and lows as she says, has averaged about 3 guys or more a week she has been talking to, has been intimate with 5 or 6 of then, texting throughout the day on and off, phone chats, running out on dates here and there that last an average of 5 hours each, and has the guy she met in September here on Monday nites when she can until 4 in the morning due to his schedule. Even though she says “she goes in stages,” which is true, you can obviously see she is enjoying this a lot more than me. Its has been hell for me. Not that I am desperate, but the search has been a grueling process. For her, guys pretty much come to her naturally, so she just weeds through them.

Now, the dilemma.

About a week ago, I started chatting with a woman on Facebook. We have been friends on there for years, but I never really knew her personally. One of this “friends of a friend” type connections. We are from the same neighborhood growing up, she lives local, and I reached out to her randomly to see who she was as I was cleaning up my friend list. We started chatting, one thing led to another, and I told her my situation. We chatted for a few days, met 2 days ago at a diner, and we got along nicely.

My wife, after I came home, started to go off on a tangent. We fought for a bit and went to bed. Last nite, it started again. She started telling me how she doesn’t think she can handle the thought of me being friendly and intimidate with another woman, how she thinks were gonna fall in love, I won’t be able to keep her in check, what if she does this, what if she does that, etc. I am a stand up guy with a career, a business, a wife and kids. I am not going to let something like this ruin my life. I am BEYOND mad right now at this behavior from my wife. She agreed to this. She has had 6 months of on and off fun with dozens of men personally and intimately, and now i FINALLY meet someone who I may want to pursue on a much more casual level, I am having shouting matches with her over it.

While I dont want trouble with my wife or god for bid divorce, how do I handle this? Or better hey, how does MY WIFE handle this?