I (33m) am married to my wife (29f) for 1.5 year and together for almost 7, non-mono for 1. So we have an open door policy on our phones unless we speficically say so, I.e. we have partners that have private stuff and occasionally we check in with each other with our poly life this way.

Per usual, as a woman, she gets a lot of "unwanted" dick pics. I put unwanted in quotations because thats what say has told me before, sexting isn't her thing which is fine.

Sometime back, I had a massive heart attack due to another medical condition and I had to jave triple bypass. Because of covid, ive basically been on my own throughout my recovery and I dont have a doctor. I also now suffer from Erectile dysfunction and lately its gotten really bad. It has actually sent me into a bit of a depression and I haven't wanted to be as intimate with my wife as much.

So this guy has been chatting my wife up. Apparently she's not interested because this gut is kinda scuzzy but keeps him around for someone to chat too. Anyways, last night, as we were going to bed she randomly tells me that this guy send her an unwanted dick pic out of no where. I thought it was weird but what ever, this happens from time to time.

So we crash but I couldn't sleep, its a side effect of the heart attack and I started thinking how do guys randomly throw a dick pic into a conversation, as this is something I dont do nor have I ever done. So I decided to check it out since we have an open phone policy and this guy means nothing to her.

Turns out that not only was it not random, but she intigated it and even instructed him how to do it. They had been sexting for some time that night while I was out with my daughter. The act itself doesn't bother me, what bothers me is how she made this big deal about this unwanted dick pic when I didn't ask about it.

Anyways this morning I asked her about it and she lied to me about it at first, saying it was unwanted. I told her to stop lying to me and that I know because I checked. She went from being what ever to crying because she felt bad. Ive had all day to process this, we don't lie to each other about what we do, or so I thought. She said she's been really horny lately and didn't want to stress me because of my depression.

Now I feel weird and off about the whole thing. What is your take away this?