I (31F) asked my husband (30M) for some leeway in exploring non-monogamy.

• He is more or less uncomfortable with the idea but wants to make me happy by meeting me halfway. However, the rules have made me feel stifled. I was only allowed to befriend those from dating sites/apps and have virtual sexual fun (nothing in person). My rebellious side always kicks in and impulse takes over (bad, I know, and I'm working on it with my individual therapist).
• A few days ago, he expressed genuine interest in meeting couples to see how that would go (instead of me going out on his own which triggers some insecurities he's also working on)... but we're not having much luck so far with finding folks and I worry those rules will stifle also.
• The rules? Neither of us has sex in our apartment (I feel like they should be able to come over and hang or have a low-key date, but that isn't something he likes either). We can only go for a couple if BOTH of us are attracted to the respective other partner... and either both of us gets laid/action or neither of us does.
• Am I unreasonable for wanting more leniency in this, or to go out on my own? Am I not losing bodily autonomy by not getting laid unless I make sure my introverted, insecure husband also gets laid?
• I don't know how to compromise properly with this, so I'm asking for help... what sorts of rules do you have in place for your nesting partner/spouse in your non-monogamous ways? Or, because he's so uncomfortable with it, should I figure out another outlet for my non-monogamous energy?

Thank you in advance!

Edited to add: I'm not looking for marriage advice but instead examples of "house rules" you and your spouse/nesting partner have agreed to. Any other information in this post was meant for context. And YES, we have already been reading "Opening Up" and "The Ethical Slut".