My ember and I invite bi men (and sometimes str8 men) to play with us. We are pretty choosy, meaning that we want to both chat with them and then meet for a beverage before play time. We have found that this allows all parties to be comfortable with each other.

And yet still, we have guys who will just flake out. "Yeah I'm leaving the house now" and then they are gone. Ghosting may or may not also happen. Now, it's not all, but maybe 40% of the guys. And to be honest, it sucks for us because in order to have that play time work, we had to get a sitter (or arrange for a sleepover), get a hotel room, etc.

Has anyone here flaked? If so, why? I am honestly curious about this topic because it makes zero sense to me to go to all the trouble to get to know a couple just to not show up to do the deed.