(47 F-48 M)

Lets see if this is the right sub for some insight. We started in this lifestyle some 20 years ago at the time they didn't have all these terms as the did today. We went down the swinger path thinking that is what we were and then found out the definition of swinger didn't fit, open relationship?

I didn't want to play with others but I wanted her to and she wanted to. We found the term Hotwife/ Stag fit better. It is had to be a term to put on it. She has had many encounters over the years with my full knowledge and approval.

We went to Hedo2 in Jamacia last year and she didn't play at all (with others). We have gone to a few parties and the same. Don't get me wrong I know it does not have to be all the time but in those settings I figured something would happen.

She had expressed about 6 months ago that she was uncomfortable with her face as she had some blotchy sun spots and acne scares and she said she was still interested in the lifestyle but wanted to look into some skin therapy to make herself feel better.

I think we are somewhere around the 4K mark (money wise) with chemical peels, laser therapy, hair removal. Honestly I didn't think she needed any of it but if it makes her feel better then why not.

When I bring up she hasn't played in awhile she says she just wasn't feeling anyone so we looked into online hook up sites this way we can have more control for potential prospects.

I've hinted before where it is ok if she is not into it anymore and I relate it to Kayaking or other hobbies that I was all about and no longer interested in. I said just because people are into something doesn't mean they have to stay with it.

I tell her how sexy she is all the time and voice my thoughts on the lifestyle.

She wanted to go back to Hedo this year and yes it was pretty cool to be nude 90% of the time there I just expected a little more. Not sure if there is even a question here as the answer will be you need to sit down and have a blunt discussion but just seeing if anyone has been in the same boat. She is mentioned a few times she thinks she is Pre-menopausal. I see people and older in the lifestyle still roaring to go.

She did look into HRT a couple years ago when I heard a podcast about how it helped living up the wifes libido and did 8 weeks of it but she did not like it and it made her gain a little weight.

If I just let it go she will not bringing it up. She will say stuff like you haven't brought up going to a party for awhile so I figured you didn't want to go. Anyway I think you catch my drift. I feel like I am being a little selfish, Have a good day everyone, thank you for making it to the bottom.