Let’s discuss a topic that gives many of us nonmonog people nightmares, shall we? A bit of risk assessment for being exposed/reputation stained. First a little bit of setting: because there are too many variables that play a part in our reputations and one of them is the kind of place we live in - if it’s a village then every little step we make might give or take points from our reputations, while if one lives in a huge and progressive cosmopolitan metropolis, then maybe most things will go unnoticed and there will be much less consequences and accountability.

So let's imagine a metropolitan region in europe that has about 1-2 million inhabitants as background for our hypothetical couple: Mrs. 202 (wife and mother of a 2yo and a 4yo that lives in the apartment 202 of a building) and her husband Mr. 202. They have opened their marriage in the last couple years, but neither had found stable playmates/relationships and for searching they have linked profiles on Feeld, with sexy pictures of them in underwear that don't show their faces much. They go on dates separately, but Mrs. 202 has mostly gotten only ONSs because of incompatibilities or being tricked and Mr. 202 so far has only matched with flaky women that ghost him either before they even meet or after a couple meet-ups. They try to find swinger couples to swap, but getting a 4-way connection is even harder.

Now to some risks assessment: let's say in situation 1 that someone angry for some reason had found the sexy Feeld profile was Mrs. 202's and decided to anonymously reveal to the neighbours and other parents of the kids in their local daycare that "Mrs. 202 has been sleeping around with random men". I imagine the moral outcry will be like "hide yo kids hide yo wife" (but instead of kids and wives, the other moms will be trying to hide their husbands). The other mothers start avoiding Mrs. 202 and they don't want their men to get close to her - they ostracize Mrs. 202 as much as they can.

I wanna compare this with situation 2: instead of being on dates with random men from Feeld let's say that Mrs. 202 was dating her husband's friend Mark and one day he showed up completely drunk outside her building shouting "Mrs. 202, don't ignore meee!! I love youuu!!!" or something like that. The neighbours (many of which are also parents at the local daycare) start gossiping that Mrs. 202 was having an affair with Mark. I think there will also be some ostracism, because people in general hate cheaters. But cheating with only 1 AP is more common than married women sleeping around with randos, so I imagine that in this second situation Mrs. 202's reputation is more recoverable. I imagine the other women won't consider her such a big threat that they'd need to hide their own men and there would be less name-calling. What do you guys think?

And about Mr. 202's reputation: I imagine that in both scenarios all the neighbours and other parents will be wondering if our couple will get a divorce in the upcoming months and if they don't separate, then he will start having the reputation of a cuck. Do you think his reputation would be worse in situation 1 or 2? Or the same?

Would you like me to post more hypothetical scenarios for Mr. and Mrs. 202 reputation risk assessments?