I (23M) and my partner (21M) have known each other for nearly a year now. We have been committed to each other off and on throughout this time. The issue i’m having is dealing with the anxiety and jealousy that was created when he first told me he didn’t want us to be in an exclusive relationship; i’m not 100% monogamous, but at that time that is what I was more comfortable with and expecting from my partner.

The issue is that he didn’t make it very clear to me that he doesn’t do monogamy (which is ok now and I share the sentiment) but because it was at a very hectic time in my life, I started to develop anxiety and jealousy because I felt I wasn’t good enough for him and this has basically lasted for the whole time we’ve been together till now.

He talked about it more with me and apologized for misguiding me and because of that I realized it’s really not about me it’s just how he functions and it helped me tap into my inner non-monogamous side. I’ve been reading posts here about opening a relationship to please your partner, I don’t think this is the case for me, I really like what we have and meeting other guys is fun for me.

I just don’t know what to do about the jealousy stuff, he reassures me, we openly communicate about everything and still I get quiet and a little annoyed if he says anything sexual or talks about other guys. What makes it the worst thing ever is when I make sexual jokes or mention other guys it’s fine because he is perfectly comfortable and doesn’t have these feelings, so it makes it seem like I don’t want him to mention other guys or make sexual jokes.

I just want it to end, I love my partner and our relationship and I really don’t want this to keep affecting my mood and our relationship but I just don’t know what to do.