My wife and I have essentially had an open relationship/marriage since before we got married (20 years). While we didn’t always practice it it’s always been there.

Currently we’re at another standstill with it and I’m just curious who else has been where we are and how you got through it and back into it.

Married with 3 kids from ranging from upper elementary age to high school age, both of us working and lots of kids events, so obviously we’re always busy and that doesn’t help the situation. Even with all that there’s definitely some times we can explore things and make time to live the LS again but she’s been standoffish about it.

We’ve both had other solo partners in the past, never been with another couple but have hung out with a few that were also in the LS. The big issue for her is how her solo relationships panned out, we all know guys aren’t always the greatest when it comes to relationships and throwing in dating a woman who’s married makes that worse. I know she loves being a HotWife/Vixen because when she’s in it she talks about how great it is. The last guy she had a great connection with really fucked things up for her though, lying, deceitful and once those lies came to light he ghosted vs working through them. This left her feeling like the issues are with her not the guys and that the LS isn’t for her and she’d be better with us not exploring/pursuing things anymore. However, anytime there’s a slight sign of a guy showing interest in her and giving her a little attention she engages but not in sexual ways or in any attempt to pursue it because she doesn’t want to relive the same outcome of the last situation.

Like I said, I know she loves it when she’s in it but the problem is getting her past the past issues and back into it again.

Any others experience this and what helped work through it?