My (29M) wife (29F) have been together for 11 years and been open for a year. I have had separate one off encounter with a couple of friends and there have been no issues with the friendships after. I'm beginning to toss the idea around to look for a friend with benefits that has the possibility to be more than a one off "try it and see". Simplest way to say it is I'd like to find someone who wants to hangout and if we're feeling frisky stuff happens with no strings attached since me and my wife are not looking to include romantic partners. I've never tried online dating and am very shy online and worry about boundaries to a fault. I also don't actively look for anyone in that way while I'm out since I mainly go out while my wife is with me.

My main worry is looking in the right place, and managing expectations when talking to others and pacing things. I understand that no one owes me anything nor should I expect anything from them, but I want to make sure the interest if upfront and clear without coming off like I have intentions to use someone and dip out. I also am worried about someone stating they understand and share that interest but never going forward. I have issues managing my time with others and my wife is always the first priority and I don't really like the idea of spreading myself too thin by adding more people into my circle than necessary. I have some trust issues in this regard due to being led on in most of my other relationships prior to my wife because they wanted something from me.

If something is unclear please feel free to ask for clarifications. I like to hear other people input to help make decisions