I (35NB) have been seeing and FWB/Comet lover (42M) for the past half a year or so and it's been very very fun, very very hot, and everything has been going really well. We both consider ourselves as relationship anarchists, and we see each other every couple of months when he's in town.
We connected over a particular kink of his which I was very open to and have come to enjoy a lot. This kink isn't super common and he requires quite a bit of trust so he doesn't often find people he can connect with and engage in this kink with. One of his long-term FWB is one such person and we've talked about her before.
While I personally don't get turned on by hearing about his sexual experiences with others, it doesn't bother me at all, it can be really informative and we've talked about our other partners before. In fact, I've often told him I wish he had more people with whom he could regularly practice this kink. With this long-term FWB, for example, we've even discussed eventually meeting up and playing the three of us together, something I said I would be totally down for.
So, we were talking yesterday, we haven't talked in a couple weeks which is normal, just to catch up. He mentioned that he went to go see this FWB for a play session and that while there he brought up the idea of the three of us playing together. Apparently during the proposal of this he mentioned that I do a particular act really well and according to him "she got jealous" and proceeded to "make it her mission to outdo me" during their play session.
That made me feel really weird. Like, reeeeally weird, but I'm not sure if I'm overreacting. It feels unnecessarily competitive? I am a very not competitive person, I don't like having to compete with other people at all, it feels like a lot of pressure. The way he communicated it to me, he seemed to believe she was saying it jokingly. However, it left a bad taste in my mouth. Especially considering this was a potential play partner, I wouldn't want to play with someone who believed they were in competition with me.
I don't know, am I just too autistic and not getting something or am I right to feel bothered? If so, any tips on how I could communicate that? Should I just let it go?
Thank you in advance!
Subreddit
Post Details
- Posted
- 1 month ago
- Reddit URL
- View post on reddit.com
- External URL
- reddit.com/r/nonmonogamy...