I (M43) really enjoy the feeling that come from connecting with new people online and in real life. That new relationship energy feels like a drug. Here’s the problem: I have trouble coming down off the high.

When I match with someone on an app and we start chatting, sharing pics and videos and sexting, I love it. But I find that when I go back to my regular family life, I’m still craving that kind of attention. Trouble is, that’s not really what my wife (43) is into. She doesn’t enjoy sending pics or sexting. Dirty talk is off the table. We have sex once or twice a week, which is considerably less than I would prefer.

Don’t get me wrong: she’s a terrific wife, and I am madly in love with her. But I find myself getting unjustifiably annoyed with her for not providing the same kind of NRE attention I’m finding these other relationships. I’d love to find a way to turn off that part of my brain and would appreciate any advice.