I, (28 F) and my partner, (37 M) are dipping our toes into ENM.

My boyfriend has experience in this as his ex essentially shared him amongst her friend group and I do not have any experience.

This started from discussing a threesome scenario, which originally was for me as I am bisexual, and evolved into talking about experimenting SEXUALLY in an open relationship.

We have discussed and talked truthfully about expectations, boundaries, and etc. over the course of several months with it cumulating to him getting an app ( my suggestion ) and me reaching out to someone I found attractive who is also ENM ( his suggestion ).

With things moving along, my boyfriend has expressed a bit of nervousness, that things have moved fast and that his original thought was that we were talking about if opportunities arise we wouldn't bat them away as we have being monogamous. He also has said that he is excited about the paths we are taking currently.

I feel, for me, that is hard to work with. Of course if we're together and we meet a cool couple or a fun woman I would be down with something like that! But on one-to-one experiences, it's simply not as appealing to me. If he's working and an interested lady approached him, and he wanted to hook up with her vs. me being a lady who is approached CONSTANTLY with interested men, I'm simply less likely to want to. I am sexually and romantically satisfied.

This dynamic is not appealing, but the concept of us BOTH looking while making decisions together IS appealing. I love this happening as an active choice that we make together while we try new things.

I may just not understand as I don’t have much experience in these matters, so I wanted to reach out to others. I love us so much, I want to do this but I don’t want to do this in a way that can breed resentment. Any advice would be amazing, and I am absolutely open to criticism if I am misunderstanding something.