Coming soon - Get a detailed view of why an account is flagged as spam!
view details
0
I feel unsure what to do
Post Body

Partner and I have a mildly hierarchical relationship. I’d say we skew more in the poly realm. What I’m trying to describe is that I’m his only serious partner but he sees other people. He says they are FWBish and I’m his only gf at the moment. So that’s why I say mild hierarchy. If he had another partner I’d consider us equals. He’s got one partner who is maybe more of a deep connection but he does not say she is his partner/gf.

Scheduling has been very sparse lately because of some big changes in his life. I’ve only seen him a few times since late May and for only a few hours. He hasn’t seen any of the other folks he dates during this time. I’m friendly with my metas and I know his one partner Eleanor is having a hard time with the lack of dates. I am too. I barely see him and it’s really difficult.

He’s been able to sort out those few hours here and there and I’m so grateful I’ve gotten to see him. I know it’s not easy for him to get that time. This week there is an event that he and I used to go to regularly on that day. Eleanor has never been but she told me she was planning to go.

I feel greedy, but I want that tiny little sliver of time just for him and I. I didn’t see him last week and I’m really missing him. But then I think Eleanor must miss him so much more and maybe I should meet him at the event and share that time with her or not go at all and let them have that time. But then my needs don’t get met and it will be at least another week before I’ll have a shot at a few hours with him again. It feels cruel to spend time alone with him under these circumstances, but bowing out doesn’t honor my needs and if she knew we were on a date I’m sure she’d be extremely hurt. What would you do in this situation?

Comments

Polyamory is very often, in fact usually, hierarchical.

Polyamory is an agreement between romantic partners that each is free to have other romantic and sexual partners. It can be quite hierarchical if one partnership includes marriage, cohabitation, kids, or international priorization over other relationships.

If he had another partner I’d consider us equals.

That's not really how it works. Its not entirely up to you. It will be his choice to decide if he wants to prioritize life partnership, marriage, etc. with another person. All kinds of things can create hierarchy. Including the length of a relationship. A new one month relationship will not have the same importance as a 20 year relationship. You don't decide if he views is relationships as equal or treats them as equal.

You have some odd ideas. You should read up more different styles of non-monogamy and polyamory.

But then I think Eleanor must miss him so much more and maybe I should meet him at the event and share that time with her

Do either of them want that?

It feels cruel to spend time alone with him under these circumstances, but bowing out doesn’t honor my needs and if she knew we were on a date I’m sure she’d be extremely hurt. What would you do in this situation?

This man is an adult. It is his responsibility to manage each of his relationships. That includes partnerships, friendships and family relationships. It is not your place to take over and manage his time and relationship with another partner. Thats dysfunctional. Your empathy is kind. But stay 100% out of it. Let him know your needs. Let him manage. You are his partner, not his mom.

[not loaded or deleted]

Sigh, I’m just trying to describe our dynamic and to say that I don’t expect him to give me all of his time because I’m his primary relationship.

Thats a big commitment and absolutely hierarchical. Which is ok. My primary partnership includes an agreement that we will retire together. We will buy a home together and not cohabitat with others. We will not have kids with, marry or retire with other partners. We are the beneficiaries of each others life insurance. All very hierarchical. What do you two mean when you agree to be primary partners. Its important to be clear and to honest about the hierarchy it brings. Of course we still expect all of each others time.

As for Eleanor, just for a second step down from the high place you are looking down on me from and put yourself in her shoes. She has not seen him since May. It’s been almost 8 weeks. Does she want him to go to the event and maybe see her for a little bit? I don’t know, how would you feel? Putting on my empathy hat, I am going to guess that yes, she would love to have that time with him.

Empathy is great. I have empathy for her too. That doesn't make it any less dysfunctional for you to try to manage this dilemma for another adult.

I know he is an adult. And I’m not telling him how to handle his relationship with her. I’m struggling with my own feelings where I can see that I am benefitting from hierarchy and all I’m saying is it feels bad.

Why is that bad?

Because we are both trying to figure out how to rebuild a relationship with him with these life changes and it’s fucking hard for everyone. He has 3 hours. Thats it. It’s not enough time and someone is gonna draw the short straw. I can have compassion for that and feel however I feel about knowing I’m privileged in this situation.

Of course. I never took issues with your feelings. But he needs to manage his own scheduling problems..

I don’t like it but with so little time there isn’t a situation where we all get our needs met. Ultimately it’s his choice what he does and he knows that. He’s leaning towards a date with me and I’m so grateful for that and I also know she will be really sad he isn’t choosing to spend that time with her. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being compassionate to another person.

You can absolutely feel compassion and stay out of the scheduling management and balancing act his has to manage with more demands on his time than he can meet.

[not loaded or deleted]

Reassurance. That this is ok? Of course its ok. He is making choices about how to spend his time. We all do that. Its ok. I'd consider it a very real possibility that she will end things if he doesn't have more time for her or she is satisfied with him being a very occasional lover. There is nothing wrong with a casual partner that you see a few times per year. Its all fine. He isn't a commodity to shared out evenly. The good thing about ENM is that she is free to date and find other casual partners or her own primary.

[not loaded or deleted]

I think she'll be ok.

[not loaded or deleted]

You asked what to do. The answer is tell your partner what you need and let him handle it.

And I'm sure she is going to be ok. Their time together sounds pretty infrequent. Hopefully she is dating and spending time with friends and living her life.

Author
Account Strength
100%
Account Age
9 years
Verified Email
No
Verified Flair
No
Total Karma
53,889
Link Karma
5,206
Comment Karma
48,120
Profile updated: 1 day ago
Posts updated: 2 months ago

Subreddit

Post Details

We try to extract some basic information from the post title. This is not always successful or accurate, please use your best judgement and compare these values to the post title and body for confirmation.
Posted
4 months ago