So my partner and I have been together for going on 3 years now. Both of us have been been poly NM for years prior to relationship.

Well, recently their has been issues as my platonic nesting partner and the partner in question don't get along well enough to live together. We'll I really want this, and have been working hard with both partners to work through feelings.

Cut to a recent discussion a month ago and my partner in question says "I want to live with a partner, and if it's not you, I will find another partner who will". This cut me hard. We've talked about living together since we first got together. Even my platonic nesting partner is warming up to the idea.

So short of it. My partner starts dating a mutual aquantince starting a few weeks ago. They go through some hard NRE. Late nights, work nights, full day hangs. OK, feelings I can work through. Tough, but I get it, and have been there.

Cut to last week, and they got covid together. They are quarantining together, day and night. It's eating at me in a hard way.

She says she understands, and if she were in my shoes, she would feel the same if not worse. She offers that she loves me and we will reconnect soon.

I feel sick though. In retrospect I wanted her to spend less time with this person to ease my heart, but I felt it was unfair. I wish she could have offered more compassion, but she was fairly incapacitated. She understood I was hurting, and chose to still hang out with this person. She offered reinforcement of her love for me, but didn't want to not spend time with this new person.

Should I have asked for me? Should she have chilled out with this person after seeing I was suffering? I know they were sick and taking care of each other, and that was beneficial, but damn, I feel awful.

I feel like I'm over reacting. I can't stop crying about it. I just want to hear from some strangers on the Internet. I just wanna feel not alone in these feelings.

Thanks.