This post has been de-listed
It is no longer included in search results and normal feeds (front page, hot posts, subreddit posts, etc). It remains visible only via the author's post history.
I always felt so bad that some people couldn’t make polyamory work for them. I would even go “tsk, tsk, should’ve known what you were getting into”. But now, three and a half years into a serious, entangled relationship, and three years into being polyamorous, I am now that guy.
I’m not completely turned off to the idea of poly but I’m also not anti-monogamy. I’m gonna keep my heart open and be smart about it from now on. I’m not attached to either dynamic. But over time I felt betrayed and unheard because my partner and I did not see eye to eye on how we wanted to practice polyamory. I wanted to feel like a team, she wanted anarchy. And we both convinced ourselves we somehow wanted the same thing. And I got hurt a lot in the process. I find the whole thing so fucking ridiculous now. Not polyamory, just the way we went about it. It makes me so mad that I am now the embodied characature that monogamous people point to as an example of polyamory failing.
I’m grieving this relationship and will need a long time to recover from it. I just can’t believe it. Thanks for letting me vent.
Thank you
Swinging is more of a team sport if you're looking for something like that.
For my partner and I...we don't do Poly, but we're open and we swing together....the swinging is the most "us" part of it. The separate play is nice, but it's not a team sport.
I 100% agree that even if they're not interested in opening up or swinging, most monogamous couples would benefit substantially from establishing more independence from the other than society typically expects, and the nonmonogamous community is a good example of how to do that 👌
Subreddit
Post Details
- Posted
- 6 months ago
- Reddit URL
- View post on reddit.com
- External URL
- reddit.com/r/nonmonogamy...
You are correct