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Expectations too high?
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Hiii. I'm solo poly, and current looking for at least one stable fwb. I prefer to mesh with other nm folk... I really feel like I keep running into ppl who are oversaturated, and in denial. 😂

or am I expecting too much? I let it be known from the beginning that I kind of require a steady flow of attention, otherwise I lose interest and get bored quickly. Keeping in mind that we all have lives and kids and partners and everything else... it takes about 48 hrs of noncommunication for me to be ready to move on. 😂

ok, maybe not that quick but it doesn't take much time, honestly. I'm not saying people should just drop what they have going on.. but I don't think it's OK to leave folks hanging for days and then justify it as... ohhh you know you're not my main priority, so suck it up. or better yet, they disappear and pop back up like nothing happened.

I'm trying to navigate this whole thing cause I'm still fairly new, but that just seems so shitty to me.

I also have this thing where we need to make plans within a weekish and if not... I'm good! 😂

am I just being a DIVA? lol

Comments
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Do you contact your all of your friends so regularly? Because it sounds like a very intense friendship if a couple of days goes by without a call or a message is enough for you to assume that you aren't friends any more.

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Does answering often mean that they are less likely to be serial killers? I'm not sure I follow your train of thought.

I'm an introvert, so I've actually asked people to not contact me every day, unless it's something important. Chatting too much is exhausting, even if I like the person. Maybe you are an extreme extrovert?

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Yeah there's a lot of low effort people on vanilla & non-vanilla sites to filter through to find a good connection. Wanting a connection & not a relationship & not just be a sex object is pretty common among swingers & ENM people overall. Casual and consistent is awesome, it takes time to filter through to those matches.

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Yeah that bothers me & partner & if it's a pattern that means we stop making an effort with them. Pretty reasonable to be bothered by not bothering to reply

Are you saying 2 days of not getting a reply out just not receiving a message? I just want clarity on your expectations. Life coming up and not sending a "good morning, thinking about you beautiful" text for 2 straight days is a lot different than not replying to your message(s) for a couple days.

Is this approach leading to successful dating for you?

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I don't believe you.

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9 months ago