Help me with a problem i'm having.

Context.. and im trying to be as brutally honest with myself... i want to fix this... and i need help from people who might understand..: i'm dating someone, who has 3 other partners and one of her partners tells me she may/may not be hooking up with people she is not dating. I think she just has the 3.

I myself am only dating her.

I've told her that she is the only woman for me. That i dont want to date others.

Recently, she was on reddit and saw a video of someone giving me head. I posted this video a month ago. The person looks a lot like her and is wearing a similar top. This video was taken when we were not together. She says she could pick my cock out of a lineup and thats how she knew it was me. She understands this video was taken during a time we were not together. But, i posted it while we were together.

This led to her asking if she could go through some of my conversations on my phone. I was on a dating app, talking to a few girls. I never received any naughty pictures, i never sexted, i never made any plans to actually meet any of these women. Whenever the women would ask to meet i would stop talking to that woman. I was merely looking for validation. But in doing so i was asking these women about being fwbs, and flirting with them actively.. because if i just told them i was searching for validity they wouldn't talk to me.

So, we were fighting about this, and her partner calls and says she should come to his house because he thinks it will help our relationship. Cooler heads will prevail. She says he just wants his cock sucked. I say i think if you leave while i am like this, and i go to bed alone tonight i think it would be the worst thing for our relationship.

She left around 8 pm. She said she would TRY to come back last night. Around 11 she asked me if i could start explaining whats in my head and i told her, i really need you here. Being alone is not good right now. Im running false narratives and i need reassurance. The longer i am apart from you while we are going through this the harder this is affecting my mind the more damaged i feel, im feeling less important, i feel like while you're leaving me like this you're going for a booty call having fun and not caring about my feelings...

After she asked me whats in my head at 11 pm she stopped responding. I havent got a response from her today, and its 10 30 am right now.

My mind has just been building on this and the longer i go without a response the worse this is becoming.

Send help!