Me (M26) and my fiancĆ© (F20) have been together for 10 months and itās been going mostly great. When we first started dating, we were both open - though we never actually slept with anyone else, but after a couple incidents triggered a lot of jealousy for her, I made the decision to close the relationship - at least for the time being. Itās been about 6 months since then, and Iām starting to wish I was in an open relationship again. Thereās nothing otherwise wrong with our situation, but the idea of never being allowed to have sex with anyone else ever again is just very silly to me and Iām beginning to feel like itās a commitment I wonāt be able to keep forever.
But at the same time, is this just anxiety about missing out on something Iām not actually missing? I mean, we have plenty of great sex - but I still desire variety and value a diverse sexual experience. At what point is it worth risking messing up something good for a more diverse life experience?
Just because sheās experienced trauma, or been forced to a level of independence of people who are on average much older than her, doesnāt mean its right to push her to continue having experiences of older folks.
The reason everyone is focussed on the nature of your relationship, and not your question about āFOMOā, is because the question is moot for a relationship doesnāt seem to have sound foundations to begin with.
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- 10 months ago
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The āsheās mature for her ageā take is setting off huge red flags for me. Sheās barely out of high school, from your original post it reads like sheās never dated anyone else, and you moved in together while she was still a teenager if the timeline of your post histories is lining up.
This might feel ārightā for you, but I have qualms about whether itās the best thing for her, monogamous or not.