Ik I'm sorry I'm just lost and frustrated. I was dishonest and hid it from him cause ik he doesn't approve. We started couple counseling and just had our second session over all I feel we have good communication and support towards each other. Emotionally I'm 100% committed to my husband I don't want anyone else he had my heart. Sexually tho I'm very frustrated and unsatisfied. I tried taking to him about it. He doesn't want anyone else tho he's one of those people that doesn't get aroused without a connection and love. He's very monogamous. Thank u for replying!

Ig not confident or doesn't really think of things like I do, doesn't get creative. It can get frustrating like if he just pays attention to what I do to him and Judy do it back to me. But yes I try to tell him stuff. And thank u so much for talking with him it's helped make me feel better about things

We both struggle to talk with each other. We are relearning how to have a conversation with each other we got so used to constantly being around other it got to the point of not knowing how to b just us The difference is idk with those guys it's just sex. Purely sexual. I have this kink of wanting to be used just fur sex. Being someone's slut or whore. So with those guys I can be that with my husband I don't want the from him. It feels wrong. I love him and respect him as he does for me so it's just awkward and uncomfortable for me. He's tried calling me a slut and I didn't really like it. My husband is the same he doesn't really get horny without a connection. I'm completely different. I just fuck to fuck or as a means to and end with a motive. Love and sex are different things for me

Thank u I appreciate that. It's been hard. Sex is always a hard convince without hurting the others confidence

Like I said I am very good at foreplay for him, I please him very well, I'm good at exploring and touching his body, getting him all worked up. But honestly he sucks at foreplay ig u could say.

Idk if it's the love and respect we have. Pretty much all the guys I've had sex with in my life I didn't have genuine feelings for or actually care about them. My husband the first man I feel what I believe is love but idk I also just feel to broken for love so it's hard for me to trust myself even. Especially since I'm struggling with stuff like this. It's like what's wrong with me? But I'll try figuring out a way to separate it. I'm very good with foreplay and touch for my husband but him not so much for me. And yeah ik that's the part that scares me cause I didn't plan to spend my life with anyone else and we've done and built so much together just to let it go. If I'm not with my husband I'm not gonna be with anyone at that point I'll feel too broken to be capable of love as cheesy as it sounds

Ok yeah I did shitty things but I'm looking for advice what other people shit in just trying to understand. I'm not trying to make u look bad? I'm just saying from me personally fuck u but I expected this as well along with the men taking this as an invitation to weirdly message me Idk where else to look for other people that aren't strictly monogamous? I didn't say I was a saint like ur comments just unnecessary? Anything you've said I haven't already told myself: p Well yeah that's something I've been debating on that's why I'm trying to understand my feelings I can just go talk to our friends or family about this shit eater to do it with strangers online that don't know me

Yeah yeah I know :p

The point was Im lost bruh and I have no one to talk to about this shit. Wasn't evening bragging? Sorry I give my husband the best sex and I'm left unsatisfied but u know nothing and aren't even trying to understand u just wanna be negative. I feel bad too I told him he's better of with a nice normal girl but he doesn't wanna give up? He knows everything I've talked to him constantly anyways go away weird I'm genuinely trying to figure myself out Mr bitter

Mmm no? No where did I say that I was proud of what I did dumbass? I'm not bragging fkkn weirdo

Well bonding and stuff I enjoy just cuddling and watching movies together. I try to help him with stuff around our house and learning about fixing things wth him. Cooking together. Recently we went out to a club together for the first time in a long time. I'm considering shrooms or something lol. I told him I wanna go on drives just listening to music. I think so. It's hard for me cause I have allot of trauma from how I grew up so I still have a hard time connecting. I have attachment issues. But he's the person I feel closest to in this world.

It is sarcasm to an unnecessary remark No I do not it was wrong? At no point did I saw it was right I even said I feel guilty? I didn't condone it. Ik I fucked up and I'm trying to figure out whats wrong with my fucking brain cause I'm genuinely frustrated and lost

Oh really? I didn't know that sir that's for opening my eyes