So late to the game. Went ENM with 20 year wife about a year ago when I (m62) was 61.

We have grown closer and more in love. Our sex life is on fire together after years of middle-aged stagnation. We both feel 10 years younger.

Jealousy is completely eliminated from my life in many areas. (Professionally, sexually, etc) My greatest turn-on now is when my wife talks flirtatiously about me dating, seducing, having sex with someone else. (Yes, I respect the privacy of those I date.) I’m feeling giddy compersion about her experiences with her person of interest.

Neither one of us has embarked yet on anything more than casual, so perhaps something might change when we both have something additional and steady and perhaps romantically involved?

The question I pose to myself and dates is often, “why didn’t anyone tell us about this???”

Such a glorious secret.

25 years ago, when married to my first wife, she had a secretive affair that ended with our divorce, but because we had small children at home and breaking up seemed difficult, at one point I suggested we open up. (She refused because she wanted to be exclusive with her affair partner.) But I often ask myself what might have been.

I mean, you can’t really tell. The word compersion isn’t even in the spell check dictionary.