I started dating J earlier this year. We didn’t want the same thing (I wanted to be in a relationship and he didn’t) and decided to stop seeing each other. Since then I’ve started dating G, who practices ENM. This is my first experience with nonmonogamy, and I have only been dating G.

My circumstances have changed and I’m moving away from our city. I’m more open to casual right now, so I reached out to J to see if he’d like to reconnect. We have plans tomorrow, but I’m struggling with when/how to tell him I’m dating G. Should I text him before our plans to see if he’s still OK with it? Or can I wait until I see him?

I feel sooner is better, I just don’t know if texting it out of the blue is appropriate?