I'm currently beginning to date someone I wouldn't normally pursue. I enjoy our connection as friendship.

I personally prefer connections with people who would pursue me, are attracted to me, people who are assertive about initiating, people who are excited to brag about me to their friends because they think I'm quite the catch, etc. Because I know how much it can suck to be dating someone who never initiates, isn't super attracted to me, is dating me simply because I'm available, and doesn't particularly feel proud of me as a partner, etc.

So, I feel like I should have these basic qualities of attraction when I first start dating someone. I don't right now for this guy, and I know he's already really into me because there's a million green flag behaviors he's exhibiting. I doubt I'll suddenly develop these levels of attraction, and if I did, I'd feel like they're nre.

I feel two different ways.

One, I feel like I have some level of responsibility as a friend to discontinue any intimacy outside of our platonic friendship because I don't want to lead him on, use him, waste his time that he intentionally allocates, etc. and as a friend, I feel like he deserves to date someone that is just as excited about dating him.

Two, I've already told him this is how I feel, and he said he appreciates that I told him, but he insists he'd like to continue dating me, so I don't see why I should end things if I've been honest and we're both having a good time.

I'd like some help parsing out these feelings. I feel like such an airheaded blubbermouth navigating this, so sorry if I sound like one. We're both enm and dating other people and content in that regard, so why do I feel like this?