So, with my husband we have opened our marriage 1,5 year's ago. We took it slowly. I was dating and checking in with him every step of the way. He said he wasn't yet interested in dating yet. ENM worked wonders for my libido and had really added lots of spice in our sex life (even though it was just me dating).

Few months back He admitted that he had a year long affair with a woman much younger than me. He started that before we agreed to have ENM and never told me anything about her this whole time which was against our approach in ENM (full transparency and veto right). So, that was black and white cheating.

It broke my heart and brought pain and devastation like nothing I've experienced before, but we decided to stay together and are actively working to reconcile (marriage therapy, gruoup therapy, IC, you name it). It has been 6 months since the Dday. During this time none of us went on a dates as it became way too triggering for me. We've been to a couple BDSM parties though where we played with each other only.

So, the question. We were invited to a sex party the upcoming weekend and I really want to go. I want to enjoy sexual liberty and experiment. But I also know that I may be triggered easily by him interacting with other women. I don't want to set limitations for him like 'we will only play with other men' as I don't want to turn the other women in "forbidden fruit". Any advise for me? Thank you