Title. This is about FWBships, not romantic partnerships. I find it plenty easy to cut people off for doing something shitty to ME or doing it to someone else in my immediate vicinity, but when it comes to partners doing something shitty to OTHERS without my knowledge it gets hairy fast. My interpersonal conflict skills are already ass, and throwing FWBship into the mix makes everything so much more complicated.

Maybe I’m just a people-pleaser, maybe I just hate conflict management, but if I’m casually seeing both Aspen and Birch, and Birch later lets me know Aspen did something shitty to them, I find it really difficult to confront Aspen about it or cut them off. If Aspen is just a mutual friend of ours, sure, I can keep my distance and set stronger boundaries to limit interactions. But another partner? I find myself hesitating to cut off partners based on that alone.

Worse, I recognize a nagging voice at the back of my mind that says “but they treat you well, that’s all you should care about.” Which my rational-brain recognizes as SUPER fucked up thinking, but I still identify it as an influence in my actions (really, lack of action).

I would love to hear some more perspectives. Tell your related stories down below of how you’ve handled this sort of thing. It’s not something I have much trouble with in my romantic relationship with my S/O, since if I catch wind of something bad happening I am more than willing to chew out my S/O for being an asshole. FWBs are different, especially if you’re like me and only see a specific FWB once every few months at most.