I tried to write out this whole thing but I just can’t stop crying.

Title says it’s all. We’ve never had a good sex life. He’s always had some excuse or the other for his low sex drive, while I had to hear about how much he used to fuck when he was younger. Recently he told me he’s on the ace spectrum and doesn’t find me sexually attractive, only new people. Once he’s in a serious relationship, he’s no longer interested in that person sexually.

What the absolute fuck? If we didn’t have sex often it would be one thing, but to hear he doesn’t want to fuck me because he loves me? What the fuck?

The larger problem for me right now is that I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel with him wanting to, and fucking, anyone else, but me.

Not only has this made me feel incredibly ugly and demolished my self esteem, if I stay in this relationship I’m going to be sexless because I don’t do hookups, and I can’t bring myself to date when my own fucking partner doesn’t want me.

I feel like this is more of a rant than anything, but I’d love some perspective. I don’t know what to do.