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Has anybody here "outgrown" their non-monogamous tendencies? Does it happen?
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I was discussing this recently with a friend, and I was saying that I don't think I could ever be with a partner long term because the restriction to only sleep with and feel for one person builds resentment in me towards them. They argued that my urge to sleep/connect with lots of girls is simply something I will grow out of. For the record I'm a 24 year old straight male. Does this happen? Have any of you experienced a shift from feeling torn between choices to only wanting one person?

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Don't forget kids! That can be a real time consuming, life changing event.

This sub is full of accounts of men who can't get dates and women who can't get the right dates. And when they do get dates all the problems that can cause with their SO.

Writing and rewriting online profiles, therapy bills, anxiety, depression, jealousy, ghosting, sti's, guilt, fear of being outed, etc

I don't think the urge subsides or people"outgrow" it, but given the work to make it happen, It is understandable that over time people just get burnt out!

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I think they are tired and the general lack of success they have experienced makes returning to mono simpler and easier. The risk-reward isn't there to continue pursuing NM.

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I do not think people's philosophy on NM changes, rather the success or failure they encounter in the pursuit of it determines whether they actively continue

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Where does "growing out of it" begin and "giving up" end. Growing out of it implies it is a natural process that occurs without consent, whereas giving up feels like a conscious choice

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1 year ago