Sorry, this is kinda all over the place. I don't even know if I'm looking for advice or just needed a place to vent.

TL;DR : girlfriend's life is extremely chaotic and mine isn't and I have trouble maintaining my peace of mind as a result but feel like it's unfair to her to break up.

My nesting partner has had a really rough go of it the last year and it's just one thing after the other. Early Last year she was chased out of her parents house by her psycho step mom then cut off both parents as a result and spent a few months depressed while working though that and struggled to find a job. Last half of 2022 she found a somewhat shitty job but it paid the bills. Then around January/February her biological mom is in the hospital and having some serious mental issues. My partner took time off work to help her mom and ended up having a falling out with work that ended in her quitting. Cut to two weeks ago, my partner has a full on panic attack that lasted days and she had to go to the hospital to get it under control.

All of these things aren't really crappy things she is doing or asking for but all seam to happen around her or to her so I can't in good conscience blame her for any of it.

However we haven't had sex in at least a month, and she is extremely emotionally demanding (for example interrupting me in the middle of a task to demand a hug or attention in the same way that a puppy might). To add on to this, the wage gap is significant between us (I make about twice as much as she does) and she's extremely successful in non-monogamy while I somehow struggle to even find a date (which I acknowledge is a me problem but still feels shitty).

This all combines to make it hard to see her as a partner instead of a dependent and I'm struggling with how to resolve it. Because on the one hand a lot of the issues aren't her fault so it feels like kicking someone while they're down if I break up with her but on the other hand, this current environment isn't sustainable for my personal mental health.