[The following may be over some of your heads (NO OFFENCE MEANT!) but possibly not since the work was made into a movie a while back with Julia Roberts, Natalie Portman, Clive Owen, and Jude Law.]

No, her name isn’t Alice Ayres but she’s been in Postman’s Park many a time, bent over and shown her cunt many a time, had her hair pink many a time, and had a pseudonym.

“Hi my name is Alizée, plain old Alizée” (LMFAO anything but a plain name like Jane Jones but I’m playing a part, innit).

And yes, I’ve read Marber’s play many a time, seen the movie once, maybe twice, and seen it on stage once.

YOU (a stranger who probably cuts the crusts off his sarnies): What are your favourite lines of the play?

ALIZÉE: When Larry says “You like him coming in your face? […] What does [his cum] taste like?” and Anna replies “It tastes like you but sweeter” to which Larry retorts: “That’s the spirit. Thank you. Thank you for your honestly. Now fuck off and die, you fucked up slag.” Mic drop YIKES.

I also like a good bukkake, babes! 🌈🍭🩷🐇🌎🎪