As the title states, my girlfriend’s mom is at the minimum - overreaching, clingy, untruthful, and downright invading.

This has been going on for a while, but my girlfriend’s mom frequently comes to her apartment and spies on her when she thinks my girlfriend isn’t paying attention. This consists of using her gate code to access the gated complex, driving into a space, and watching to see what she’s doing. My girlfriend and I imagine that it is because she doesn’t like me and her together and me as a person to be completely honest. So she sits in the parking lot to see if she can see my car and/or if I happen to exit the house or anything.

My girlfriend claims they have had a decent relationship but now that she’s out of college, her mother overreaches and tries to push herself into my girlfriend’s life. She’s always been aggressively clingy with her and in high school, her mom actually yelled at me for talking to her daughter. She was threatened by me. My girlfriend and I are both 21, happily together. We’ve had some issues in the past which her mother holds onto and uses against our relationship but never is up front about it with my girlfriend. Just makes snide remarks and treats her like she’s in high school with an iron fist of control. My girlfriend wants to talk to her but also doesn’t because her mom makes herself the victim and will cry/become extremely hostile if she is made the “bad guy”. There’s almost zero room for communication.

Also I’m making this post for my girlfriend because she does not have Reddit.

Any advice?

TL;DR - girlfriend’s mom is crazy overbearing on her and tends to show up and spy on her at her apartment, need advice for how to handle this situation and situations like it.